IMG_0416 (via Will Wilkinson)

“What does ‘boring’ do for a wealthy sports star, and is it worth trading for 11 willing mistresses? As a resident Iowan, I can tell you what “boring” buys here in the heartland: a butter sculpture. Here is Tiger Woods, pre-scandal, at the 2005 Iowa State Fair. Not only is he entirely constructed of low moisture, pure-cream Iowa butter, he, butter Tiger Woods, is holding onto a butter tiger. It is the highest honor this state can bestow and it is glorious.

“Look upon what you have lost, Tiger, and despair.”

The Benefits of “Boring, Kerry Howley